Friday, November 4, 2005

Fessin' Up

In a stunning move, Matt Lawton didn't dodge the issue of his steroid suspension. He confessed, said he screwed up and didn't try and wank out of it by blaming a buddy or sheer ignorance. What a novel idea. Taking responsibility for ones actions!

Here's what he had to say;
"I made a terrible and foolish mistake that I will regret for the rest of my life," Lawton said, in a statement to The Associated Press. "I take full responsibility for my actions and did not appeal my suspension. I apologize to the fans, the game, my family and all those people that I let down. I am truly sorry and deeply regret my terrible lapse in judgment."
Sadly, since he played poorly for three teams this past season (Pirates, Cubs then Yankees), he has little to no chance of coming back a Yankee. He most likely will have trouble getting on any roster next season. Still, that didn't stop him from dealing with this like a man.

It sure would be nice if more offenders did this when they get caugh with their hand in the 'cookie' jar, wouldn't it? Not that it makes me condone using banned substances, but it will make forgiving a whole lot easier.

Thursday, November 3, 2005

Lawmakers With Time On Their Hands

I am so glad that a lawmaker has decided to DO SOMETHING about the less than stellar umpiring in the 2005 MLB Postseason. Thank the GODS that SOMEBODY is looking out for the interest of the fans, the integrity of the game and trying to make them pay for being crappy!

Ok, so that was a sarcastic blast at Missouri Rep. Jeff Roorda, D-Barnhart. He is so darn upset about this that he has decided to tax umpires for working in Missouri. That's right, you don't do the job right and you're going to get taxed. I can see from looking at his Official Page that this falls under keeping Terrorism under control. It also helps with Corrections. And it would be a huge boost for Economic Development in the State of Missouri.

This guy is a clown who is grandstanding for the voters. And if that's not enough, he plans on wasting the time of the Legislature by actually introducing a Bill. This is such a high priority for the State of Missouri, I'm sure. To be honest, I think he's been watching too much of McCain and Bunning's steroids posturing for his own good.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Remembering Pete Rose, the Player

I recall that I loathed Pete Rose the player as a kid. I loathed him with an intensity that bordered on maniacal hatred. I despised him because I feared him. Feared what he could do on the field. Feared what he could do with a bat. He was a time bomb, waiting to go off and it was always a bad thing for the opposition when he did.

Many of us have forgotten about Rose the Player because all we recall is Rose the Gambler, Rose the Liar, Rose the Bad Cartoon of a Man. Steve Treder over at the Hardball Times has done a great job reminding us about Rose the Player. Something we should all do on occasion. It's also a great read...

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

This Just In: Pujols is Good!

Albert Pujols has cemented his legend. With one mighty swing of his bat, he has that Iconic Moment etched in the minds of baseball history. No matter what happens next in the NLDS, Pujols is now Legend. Great players rise to the occasion in moments such as this, and Pujols most certainly rose to this particular occasion. Most emphatically.

This was no cheapie Crawford Boxes HR, this was a Ruthian blast. As Bernie Miklasz wrote in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch today,

The home run was measured at 412 feet, which is absolute fiction, and a joke - because this baby had to carry about 435, 450 feet.

which means that Pujols blast carried to Game 6 tomorrow night in St. Louis. The St. Louis faithful will most certainly bring down the house the first time Prince Albert strides to the plate tomorrow. A thundering ovation is slowly building up along the banks of the Mississippi. The crescendo will be in the bottom of the 1st inning. The Astros may never recover and the Legend will grow.

To those who haven't figured it out yet, Pujols is that good. Last night was proof.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Woof! Woof!

That would be the sound of Alex Gonzalez's play in the ALDS, in his own words. And in some respects The Bench Jockey has gotta agree. Of course, he had company in the Pin Striped dog pound. Namely Gary "I didn't know Barry was giving me Steroids" Sheffield and Hideki Matsui were equally ineffective during the ALDS. It kind of seemed like the Yankees in the last four games of the ALCS from just a year ago. The Big Bats fell asleep.

Woof, indeed.

Now begins the media's favorite game: Watching the Yankees to see what George and Co. will do. Which begs the question, would the media care as much if George owned a team in Milwaukee?

I'd just as soon stay fired, thanks...

Today, the Pittsburgh Pirates are going to announce that recently sacked LA Dodgers skipper Jim Tracy will be taking command of the Good Ship Lollipop that is the Pirates organization as we know and laugh at it.

What is that man thinking? I would just as soon stay unemployed myself. That team is a bad joke, from top to bottom. Got a new ballpark and can't give tickets away to games being played there. I'm thinking this is one job that make unemployment checks look good...

Best of luck, Mr.'re going to need it.

Friday, September 30, 2005

'Roids and Haters

I've been reading some stuff about Mark McGwire and his return to Busch Stadium. Mostly conjecture about whether or not he'll be booed due to his appearence before Congress last spring. That, and the entrenched belief that he used steroids of one kind or another. That he appeared to have cheated, in other words.

I've also not heard one person (besides Jayson Stark) step up and start calling out the pitchers that have cheated throughout history. Well, except for me that is. And I still believe that most fans and baseball writers are stark raving hypocrites. Nobody really gives a damn about cheating. What has people's knickers in a twist is the notion of somebody breaking to most sacred, holy records in baseball. Home Run records. That's what this is all about. Really. I promise you that.

If you don't believe me, then please to explain to The Bench Jockey why on earth there aren't sites called Or Or How come we all just sort of chuckled last year when Julian Tavarez was caught and suspended with a pine tar like mixture on his cap? We didn't get cries of indignation about that, no we got apologists saying that sort of thing happens all the time. That's it's "part of the game."

Horse puckey is what I say to that stupid line of reasoning. Absolute nonesense. If shooting juice in your viens is cheating, then so is loading up, scuffing, scratching or any other form of altering the ball. It's all done for the same purpose. To gain an unfair advantage. Let's see what the fine folks at Merriam-Webster Online have to say about cheating;

Main Entry: 1cheat
Pronunciation: 'chEt
Function: verb
transitive senses
1 : to deprive of something valuable by the use of deceit or fraud
2 : to influence or lead by deceit, trick, or artifice
3 : to elude or thwart by or as if by outwitting <cheat death>
intransitive senses
1 a : to practice fraud or trickery b : to violate rules dishonestly (as at cards or on an examination)
2 : to be sexually unfaithful -- usually used with on
- cheat·er noun
synonyms CHEAT, COZEN, DEFRAUD, SWINDLE mean to get something by dishonesty or deception. CHEAT suggests using trickery that escapes observation <cheated me out of a dollar>. COZEN implies artful persuading or flattering to attain a thing or a purpose cozen her grandfather out of a few dollars>. DEFRAUD stresses depriving one of his or her rights and usually connotes deliberate perversion of the truth <defrauded of her inheritance by an unscrupulous lawyer>. SWINDLE implies large-scale cheating by misrepresentation or abuse of confidence <swindled of their savings by con artists>.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that pitchers messing with the baseball is cheating as well. I'm also going to point out that almost HALF of the players suspended by MLB for violation of the anemic drug policy were pitchers. So, not only do they mess with the ball, but some even try and outdo the hitters by shooting juice in their veins. But, we've been giving them a free pass.

Go ahead and boo the alleged and suspect steroid users. That's fine. But, while you're doing that, start up the drives to get the cheaters kicked out of Cooperstown. The ones that we celebrate for cheating. You know who I'm talking about here. Not like I need to hit you over the head with a jar of Vaseline, y'know? All I'm saying is, don't be a hypocrite and just boo the hitters who bulked up to hit the ball farther. Rag the pitchers as well. Drive cheating of ALL sorts out of the game. Not just from Home Plate.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Both Ends of the Spectrum

From today's newsletter, we get this little nugget of information;
The Cards are the best team in the majors with a record of 95-56 (.629). They are 15 games behind the 1954 Indians, who went 110-41 (.728) through 151 games.

The Royals are the worst team in the majors with a record of 48-99 (.327). They are 15 games better than the 1916 Athletics, who went 33-114 (.224) through 147 games.
So, what this essentially means, is that the State of Missouri has the best and the worst teams in MLB. Dubious distinction, that.